Written by Robert Scucci | Published
While your mileage may vary, I've always been a fan of Blaxploitation parody because of how flawless the humor is and how willing everyone is to commit to it. This is Lee Frost's place The Two-Headed Thing (1972), Rudy Ray Moore Dolemite (1975), and Joel Taylor They included Tyrone (2023) is all essential viewing if you're looking for a solid entry point into the genre, but there's a hidden gem that I never felt I got enough love for after sitting down and watching it in depth: 1988's I will kiss you.
This is Keenen Ivory Wayans directorial debut, and you can tell he was hungry because there must be hundreds of jokes that filled its 89 minute run time. Don't even admit it for a second. It's a master class in physical comedy, horror comedy, and the kind of racial comedy where everyone on screen is having the time of their lives trying to make the funniest movie they can put together with a $3 million budget.
The Gold Chain Epidemic and Its Subsequent Collapse
As overtly slapstick as I will kiss you may seem over the top, it gets a lot of laughs by playing everything straight. The entire film takes place in Any Ghetto, USA, where we are introduced to our hero, Jack Spade (Keenen Ivory Wayans). He finds out that his brother Junebug overdosed on gold chains and is disappointed that both his mother Belle (Ja'Net DuBois) and sister-in-law Cheryl (Dawnn Lewis) don't want him to take revenge. Their logic is simple: they've already lost Junebug, and they can't get over the pain of losing another family member.
Taking it upon himself, Jack tries to get revenge on Mr. Big (John Vernon), the crime lord behind the gold rush, is also looking for John Slade (Bernie Casey). Reluctant to return to his crime-fighting ways, John Slade has a change of heart and helps Jack assemble a team of vigilantes, each with their own unique characteristics and special abilities. We are introduced to Kung Fu Joe (Steve James), Flyguy (Antonio Fargas), Slammer (Jim Brown), and Hammer (Isaac Hayes), and together they are determined to restore peace to Any Ghetto, USA, even though they know they will have to fire the big guns if the going gets tough.
It Makes Kind of Crimes That Don't Announce themselves as Gags
I will kiss you it earns major points because it knows it's a comedy but doesn't support the audience when things get crazy. My favorite sequence in the entire movie is when Belle fights off a bunch of aggressive patrons at the diner and goes into full-on blackout mode. During this short sequence, Ja'Net DuBois is replaced by a white stunt double sporting a tight afro and mustache, looking more like Gene Shalit than a middle-aged black mother. A joke stays true because no one admits it or tells it again. It just happens, and we're on to the next gag.
Similarly, whenever the supporters of Mr. Big, Willie (Kadeem Hardison) and Leonard (Damon Wayans), stepping out of line, get kicked out of whatever building they're in. Asked if they wanted to take the back door or the stairs, they always chose the latter before being thrown down. On its own, this recurring gag is funny, but what's important is that everyone in this place understands what the setup means and goes along with it like there's no other way to handle things.
All about I will kiss you it's incredibly unlikely, but it's done this way because the only thing that matters is chasing laughs. Don't even get me started on Hammer's suiting-up montage when the attack is imminent, and how badly it goes when he thinks he finally has enough weapons on his person.
If you're looking for a straight-up jokefest that isn't afraid to make fun of the full, look no further I will kiss you. It might be my favorite thing the Wayans brothers have worked on, and for good reason. They tried to make the funniest Blaxploitation movie they could with the resources they had, and they succeeded in every measurable way I can reasonably think of.
As of this writing, I will kiss you is streaming for free on Tubi.
I WILL GIVE YOU A SUCKA SCORE
