The facilitator Jeff Nippard talks about his mental health issues after the death of his fiancee, Stephanie Buttermore.
“I was staying in my friend's basement a few weeks ago and he has a barbell and a dumbbell downstairs, so I was going back to my roots with basic strength training again. Part of me likes a small setup like this because the obstacles force me to create,” wrote Nippard on Instagram on Sunday, May 24, accompanying his videos. “Exercising during grief was one of the things I didn't want to do but I'm glad I did when it's over.”
She continued, “My depression was bad, so my energy level was down and for the first time I can remember, I have no real desire to exercise. That said, I find that if I just say to myself, 'Go in and lift an empty bar up and down 10 times, that's better than nothing' … at least I'm moving. After that, if I still want to quit, I will. I usually feel better once it's started.”
Nippard shared that he also “took some time off from social media and YouTube.”
“A break I felt I needed, so thank you for your understanding,” he wrote. “I am very grateful for the support during this time and I hope you are doing well 🙏🏻.”
In March, news broke that Buttermore had died.
“It is with great sadness that we share the sudden passing of Jeff's fiancée and partner of 10 years, Stephanie,” an Instagram statement from Nippard's team read at the time. As many of you know, Stephanie meant the world to Jeff.
The statement continued, “She will be remembered for her warmth and compassion, her love for her family and her Ph.D research on ovarian cancer. We kindly ask for privacy as we deal with this tragic loss. Thank you for your understanding and support during this difficult time.”
One month later, Nippard broke his silence on Buttermore's death by sharing that he had spent time “with the family and close friends of his late fiancée to celebrate her life and share their memories.”
“When I think about Stephanie, I keep coming back to how loving and kind she was. She truly made the world a better place,” she wrote on Instagram in April. “I'm not sure if many of you know this, but when he was studying for his PhD, he studied a protein called RHAMM, and found out that it can help in the early detection of ovarian cancer. There is a copy of his PhD dissertation in my bio if you want to read it. It was one of the first things that made me love him.”
She continued, “On her YouTube channel, she's helped people feel less alone, especially when it comes to food and body struggles. Her journey has helped a lot of people to accept themselves more, and I love her for doing that. She always put her family first and had an especially loving bond with her mom. We built this backyard in her honor (purple was her favorite color for me, and that means a lot.”
Nippard shared that she has read “a lot” of messages over the past few weeks, noting that “the support has helped us all.”
“Stephanie's mom loves hearing stories about the difference her daughter has made. We talk almost every day and it's been incredibly difficult but we're doing it together,” she concluded. “If you were a fan of Stephanie, then I'm your fan. I hope she made your life better in some way. She made my life amazing and I'm so grateful for the time she had ❤️.”
